You've Got Me Hooked: A series of One Shot Cracks
by XoxPhoenix10
Summary: A series of Crack!Oneshots for OUAT, mainly focusing on Hook and Emma. Pairings include Captain Swan, Snowing, Rumbelle, Darling Pan. Frankenwolf, Mad Queen, and more! If you have a prompt, PM or Review!
1. Ballroom Blitz

**What happens when Storybrooke's finest host a modern ball? Or when Rumplestiltskin, Prince Charming, Captain Hook, The Mad Hatter, Peter Pan and Dr. Frankenstein sing on stage? What happens when a princess and pirate fall in love? A disaster. A hilarious disaster. Feat. Captain Swan, Snowing, Mad Queen, Rumbelle& Frankenwolf. A Crack!Fic. loosely based on my fic 'Enter NightThe characters, the show and the songs don't belong to me. This is for pure entertainment. Enjoy guys! **

The night was enchanting as the stars twinkled brightly over the not so ordinary town of Storybrooke, Maine. For once, the residents of the town endured one whole week of peace. Cora was dead, Greg and Tamara were defeated, Regina was no longer set to kill everyone's happy ending, King George was gone for now and Rumpelstiltskin and Captain Hook were done being at each others throats. With all this new found bliss, Snow White and Prince Charming decided to host the town's first ball. A modernized ball of course. Regina, Archie, Ruby, the Dwarves, Granny, Emma, Belle, Wendy, Peter, Captain Hook and even the Dark One helped prepare for the eventful night. White lights were hung along columns and fences, tables were decorated with freshly cut red roses and blue lit candles. The town hall was ready for the night's celebration.

A deal was made among the townsfolk of Storybrooke, that they would all arrive in festive garments from the Enchanted Forest, something Emma hung her head about. From Mr. Gold's pawn shop, Snow and Charming found some of their clothing; a white long gown for Mary Margaret, and a red prince's uniform for David, along with his trusty sword. Little Red Riding Hood found her old dress and added her favorite red hood to the ensemble to make it pop. The nuns… uh fairies, dressed up in their traditional fairy godmother dresses and the dwarves went even as far as to carry their pick axes along with them.

Emma sat in her room pondering over what she could possibly wear. Everything in Gold's shop either belonged to someone or was utterly repelling, and she doubted her parents would let her leave the house in one of her leather jackets. Just then, the savior heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." Emma said. The door clicked open, and in came Snow White holding a garment bag over her shoulder.

"Heard you had nothing to wear, so I begged Blue to make you a little something." The woman grinned. She unzipped the garment bag, revealing a long gold dress. It wasn't too old fashioned. There wasn't a large skirt or an overly tight corset. It was more of a modern day evening gown with only a hint of Enchanted Forest Princess décor. It had a sweetheart neckline, and was smooth and elegant with a small slit at the right leg. The gold was dark and shimmery, with hints of black in it. A matching black corset with gold laces, sat at the top, along with a black belt with a sword attached to it. "We knew you were a little attached." Snow smiled.

"Wow," Emma said, gazing upon the dress. "It's beautiful. But I can't wear this. It's too much."

"Oh please, Mother Superior turned Pinocchio back into a boy, this dress is by far the easiest thing, she has done in a long time." Her mother scoffs. "Now stop sulking and get dressed. We don't want to be late for our own party."

Red, Wendy, Belle, Hook, Peter and Whale were already at the town hall getting everything ready.

"Seriously?" Red scolded. "You two couldn't even bother wearing something… more elegant?" She motioned to Wendy and Hook, who were in slightly fancier versions of their pirate attire. Wendy had on her favorite blue blouse under a brown leather corset, matching boots and black leather pants. And of course she was heavily armed with her sword and daggers. Hook was wearing his everyday black coat over his everyday black blouse… he basically was wearing what he would on a normal day, except this time he had on a gold vest rather than his usual black one. Both of them had probably the same amount of eyeliner, but of course Wendy added her signature shocking blue eye shadow.

"Pirates." Hook answered with a cheeky grin, causing both Red and Belle to roll their eyes.

Belle started pouring herself a drink, when the Mad Hatter and the Evil Queen came in hand in hand. He, wearing his precious hat and crazed outfit, and she, dressed in her exquisite regal black dress encrusted with diamonds, strode proudly to the middle of the hall.

"I'm never getting used to that." Whale said, noting how together those two were.

"I think they look good together." Peter says. "He really brings out the craziness in her eyes."

Grace and Henry followed the couple, in their own cute Enchanted Forest ensemble.

"Belle, would you be a dear and pour me one?" Wendy says handing her a cup. "Something tells me I'll need the whole bar to get through tonight." She chugs the entire cup of beer down in a matter of seconds.

"You should probably slow down." Belle warned with a giggle. "You definitely don't want to be drunk when the Sheriff comes in."

At the mention of Emma, Hook's eyes lighten up. It's been a while since they'd seen each other. The last time they were around each other, he had to dodge a vase aimed straight for his head.

More people started pouring in the hall, and soon Peter and Wendy retired to the stage to ready the music. The older crowd, especially the royal hosts, wanted to flood the ball room with classic music from their homeland, but the two teenagers were intent on crashing that with a mix of modern dub step and some classic rock and roll. Red, and Hook supported this idea because, well Red was a party animal and Hook just liked breaking the rules even though he had no idea what rock and dub step were. So for now, the teenage misfits complied with the rules and put on the boring classical music.

Red, Whale and Granny took turns manning the bar, while Hook simply sat at the bar and kept the drinks coming. His sister was right about one thing, alcohol was the only way to survive this party.

The hall doors opened once more, and this time, the royal couple entered, smiling, holding hands, while Emma awkwardly followed suit. She was wearing the dress. A diamond necklace hung from her throat, while her golden curls flowed along her shoulders. Her not-so-Enchanted-Forest- black-pumps clicked against the marble flooring as she awkwardly made her way to the bar, sitting onto a stool. Killian was a few meters away, unable to take his eyes off her. It was only when she turned to look at him, that he shifted his gaze back to his glass of rum. Red made her way to Wendy and Peter, along with Henry. All four of them had evil little grins plastered across their faces.

"I can't believe she's wearing the dress." Red said.

"I can't believe we actually tricked Snow into giving her the dress." Wendy smiles. "And now they match!"

"Did you see the way he looked at her?" Peter asked.

"Just like she looked at him."

"Operation Beanstalk is in motion." Henry smiled.

"Yes kid," Ruby ruffles his hair. "We're geniuses."

"I can't believe the Codfish is actually head over heels in love." Peter sneers.

"Hey!" Wendy smacks his arm playfully, Peter grins in response. "Behave, that's my big brother over there."

Rumpelstiltskin came through the doors, in his Dark One attire, and lead Belle to the dance floor, her yellowy gold dress swept the floor as he twirled her around. Next to them Snow White and Prince Charming were intimately dancing, and across from them Regina and Jefferson stole the show.

Half an hour into the party and Peter walked up to Red at the bar, grinning wickedly. "It's ready."

"Ruby?" Wendy raised an eyebrow at her friend.

"What happens when Rumplestiltskin, Captain Hook, Prince Charming, The Mad Hatter, Peter Pan and Dr. Frankenstein go up on stage?" The wolf grinned mischievously.

"What did you do?"

"You'll see soon enough."

Hook, Rumpel, Jefferson, Charming, Whale and Peter followed Red backstage, leaving some of the women confused. Emma watched as Killian disappeared through the curtains, curious as to what they were up to.

Suddenly, the classical music comes to a halt. The lights dim and are flashing different colors, as the curtains are drawn. The male fairy tale characters are each at an instrument. Hook at a guitar, though Wendy wonders how he'll play it one handed; Peter was at the drums, Whale at the bass, Rumpel at the mike and Charming at the lead guitar, and Jefferson at the other mike.

Snow's mouth made a perfect 'O', Regina sat by a table, her face in complete amusement, Emma blinked a few times, Wendy filled her cup to the rim with rum, Belle muffled a giggle and Red sat on a barstool trying to ignore her Granny's unimpressed gaze.

The men started to play, surprisingly pretty well, as Jefferson's voice echoed through the room.

"_You ready Whale_?"

"Uh huh"

"_Charming_?"

"Yeah"

"_Hook_?"

"Okay."

"_Alright Fellas, let's go_!"

"_It's been getting so hard_." They all sang. "_Living with the things you do to me_." As they chanted, Hook stared at Emma, Charming at Snow, Whale at Ruby, Jefferson at the Queen, Rumpel at Belle and Peter at Wendy. The crowd broke down and started dancing. The younger townsfolk laughing while the older ones shaking their heads, disapprovingly. Suddenly, Hook grabbed the mike: "_Oh I see a man in the back- as a matter of fact his eyes are as red as the sun._"

"_And the girl in the corner let no one ignore her, she thinks that she's the passionate one_." Charming sang.

"RUBY WHY?" Wendy whined, blushing. "WHY?"

"Yeah, what gives?" Emma joined in, hiding from Killian's blue stare.

"Because you two are the only ones who feel awkward around the guys." Red smiled.

"Yeah it's time for you two to face your men." Belle winked.

"Granny, put an extra shot in my Daiquiri." Emma moaned.

Gold grabbed the mike and in his crazed Dark One voice sang: "_And the man in the back said 'Everyone attack' and it turned into a ballroom blitz._"

"Red, next time please warn everyone that Rumplestiltskin will be singing." Snow chimed in. "Though I have to ask… How'd you get them to do it."

"Well, I made a deal with Rumpel." Belle said innocently.

"Peter and Charming had no problem with it." Ruby smirked.

"I used my magic on Jefferson." Regina laughed. "Literally and Figuratively."

"Did not need to know that." Emma coughed up her Daiquiri. "How'd you get Whale and Hook to agree?"

"Whale didn't need much convincing, he owes me." Red said, sipping a Margarita. "And I threatened to go all wolf on Hook's ass next full moon if he didn't do it."

"Also didn't need to know that." Wendy added, pouring herself another shot of rum. The song finished, and the men retreated back to their stations. Wendy got up and joined Peter at the mixer. Emma cautiously approached Hook.

"Seriously… I mean Ballroom Blitz?" Emma said as he downed another shot of rum.

"Well, the wolf girl didn't really give me a choice, now did she?" She could sense the iciness in his voice, as he refused to look at her. They ended their relationship rocky; she told him she had no feelings for him, that he was just a distraction. He ended up blowing up steam with some barmaid at the Rabbit Hole, and she came after him with the fury of the Dark One. Because the truth was, she had feelings for him, and so did he have for her. They were too scared to reveal this to each other, so now their walls were as high as the clouds and as thick as the mountains.

The two of them turned away from each other, each tending to their own drinks. From afar, Wendy, Peter, Red and Henry were watching. Since the beginning, they made it their goal to get the two love birds back together, no matter what.

"Okay, so how do we start this thing." Peter asked.

"Henry, go down there and ask your mom to dance." Red said. "I'll go push the Captain into the crowd, and Wendy, Peter, you two go fix the music up. When _the_ song comes up, come down to the floor and dance together, and when I give you guys the cue, make the move."

"Why do we have to dance together?" Wendy groaned.

"I don't mind it." Peter grinned. He got another smack in his arm by Wendy.

"Okay, get to your places people." Red orders.

Midway through a remix of 'Lonely Boy' by the Black Keys, everyone, but Peter and Wendy are dancing their hearts away. Peter nods to Wendy, who switched to 'Daylight' by Maroon 5, as Whale took over dancing with Red. Charming and Snow danced closer together, and Henry retreated to dance with Grace._ Here I am waiting I'll have to leave soon, why am I holding on?_

Hook and Emma awkwardly, stood in the middle of the dance floor, as the couples joined together. _And when the daylight comes I'll have to go but tonight I'm gonna hold you so close._

Peter made his way to the left of the room, 'accidentally' bumping into Emma, while Wendy, 'accidentally' pushes her brother. _But tonight I need to hold you so close. _Killian and Emma end up smashing into each other. The breathing ceases and Emma swallowed hard.

"Care to dance Swan?" Hook asked, once he regained his ability to breathe. He holds out his hand to her.

"Why not, Captain." She says, taking his hand and they move to the center of the dance room. _Here I am staring at your perfection, in my arms, so beautiful._ He grabbed her waist with his hand and hook, and she laid hers on his broad shoulders. One dance couldn't hurt right? They moved swiftly and gracefully, their gaze never breaking from each other.

From across the floor, Snow turned her head and saw her daughter and the pirate.

"Look." She told Charming, as she danced with him. He saw the sight and involuntarily growled. "Easy tiger, they're just dancing."

"It's what follows the dancing that I'm worried about." He eyed Killian, watching his every move. "I don't like how he's looking at her."

"Charming." Snow pulled her husband to face towards her and kissed him. "She's a grown woman, she can handle him. He made her happy before, and she hasn't been the same since they broke up. Maybe this is what she needs."

"Maybe." He held his wife tightly. "But he hurts her again and he loses the other hand." _But tonight I need to hold you so close._

As the song came to an end, an idea popped into Wendy's mind. She went up on the stage and started the music. Rihanna's slow song 'Stay' started playing. Then she descended the steps to join Ruby at the bar. Killian and Emma continued dancing. _I threw my hands in the air, I said show me something. He said 'If you dare, come a little closer'._

"They look adorable." Ruby said, peering out to them. Emma's arms were wrapped around Killian's neck. Their faces were centimeters apart.

"They're meant to be." Wendy replied.

"Of course you would know that."

"Visions never lie my friend."

"Would the fair maiden like to dance?" Came a deep voice. Whale held out his hand to Ruby, and she took it grinning.

"Monster to monster?"

"But, of course." _Not really sure how to feel about it, something in the way you move._

Wendy smiled at her friends. Love was blossoming around her as Belle laid her head on Gold's chest, as Regina and Jefferson stole a few kisses, Snow and Charming laid their foreheads against each other and Killian leads Emma into a passionate dip.

"I never stopped thinking about you." Hook confessed, as he swooped the savior back up. She smiled weakly. She couldn't go down this path again, but she missed him so bad.

"Me neither." She admits. One wall down. _And I want you to stay._

"So I guess, it's just you and me." Peter said interrupting Wendy's thoughts.

"I guess so Lost Boy." He smirked. She laughed. "Well, are you going to ask me to dance or what?"

Peter was surprised at Wendy. "Well, I never thought you'd be so forward."

"You think so little of me Pan." She whispered in his ear, dragging him out onto the dance floor. Red shot her a I-told-you-so look, and Wendy shot back a shut-up-let-me-enjoy-this look.

"Swan… Emma." Killian started, his voice turned low and husky. Emma looked up at her with welcoming green eyes. "I'm sorry I hurt you love. I.." Emma stopped him.

"It's my fault." She said. "I lied to you. I pushed you away."

"You lied?"

"I.. I care about you… deeply." She admitted, trying to force back a tear. "I think I love you." He was stunned. Catching his breath, he caressed her cheek with his right hand.

"I love you too Swan. I bloody lov…" She stopped him by closing the distance. Kissing him with raw passion. He returned the kiss, showing her just how much he missed her. How much he loved her. _Funny you're the broken one, but I'm the only one who needed saving._

"It's about time." Belle giggled. Rumpelstiltskin tried to ignore the couple. Charming looked at the pirate with anger, his protective mode on, as Snow held him back, smiling. Killian looked around and saw that the whole dance room was staring at them, a boyish grin took over his face.

"We should probably go somewhere private." Emma whispered in his ear. The heat of her breath tingling against his skin, causing the hairs on his neck to stand up.

Wendy smiled overhearing them. She gave a quick peck to Peter and lead him back to the stage.

"You know how to play guitar right?" She winked.

"One of my greatest passions in this world." He smiled.

"Good."

A few minutes passed, and the curtains of the stage drew open once more. Wendy stood at the microphone and Peter sat next to her on a stool, holding an acoustic guitar.

"This is for all you love birds out there." She smirked into the mike. He started playing and she started singing. "_Settle down with me. Cover me up. Cuddle me in_."

"So, when do you wanna ditch this place." Emma whispered in Hooks ear.

"When your father stops threatening me with his glares." He laughs.

"_And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck_."

"God, you're beautiful." Killian stares into her eyes.

"_I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet._"

"You're not so bad either, for a pirate." Emma responds.

"_And with a feeling I'll forget. I'm in love now. Kiss me like you wanna be loved. You wanna be loved. You wanna be loved_"

Killian cups her face and softly brings his lips to hers. Her hands move from his shoulders to his neck and cheek.

"_This feels like falling in love. Falling in love. We're falling in love_."

When the song was over. Emma and Hook escaped through the back door, to his ship. For the first time months both of them were able to let go of their pain, their fears, their sorrow, as they lost themselves in their love. An hour later Emma rose from his bed, clutching sheets wrapped around her body, as she went along the ship to retrieve her discarded clothes. As she exited his cabin she dropped the clothing she was carrying as the savior stumbled upon Wendy sitting on a barrel, with her legs wrapped around Peter's torso, making out with him.

"Oh crap." She exclaimed, as the two teenagers broke free. They jumped from each other like to positive charges. No one spoke. No one moved. Darling and Pan simply stared at the saviors messed up hair and the bra and dress at her feet. The silence was disturbed as soon as Hook exited the cabin as well, only in his leather pants.

"What's wrong love? I… oh." He stopped in his tracks. He stared at Wendy then at Peter's half unbuttoned shirt.

"Well this is awkward." Peter managed to say. Wendy and Emma glared daggers at him.

"Really." Hook snaps. "In my ship?" Before the two males can lunge at each other, Wendy intervened.

"Well brother, you told me once that this ship was just as much my home as she is yours. And I don't see how what I am doing is any worse from what you've already done."

Emma Swan was happy. She was finally in love. But as she felt a blush run to her cheeks, there was something she was more sure of then her love for Captain Hook. She hated Storybrooke.

**REVIEW AND FAVORITE! :D To be or not to be a one-shot? Now that it the question!**

**-xoxphoenix10**


	2. Switched Up

**Summary: Regina and Gold's magic duel takes a turn for the worst, landing Emma, Hook, Snow and David in a peculiar situation.**

"You have got to be kidding me."

Snow stood at the helm at the ship, leaning against the wood with a cocky grin, as Emma was banging her head against the wall. Though Snow wasn't Snow, and Emma wasn't Emma.

"This is just bloody brilliant" Snow's voice says, and it causes Regina to laugh… really laugh because of her… uhh… his American accent.

"Shut up Hook!" Emma's voice says.

"Or what? Are you going to punch me in the face? I doubt your wife will be the fairest after that."

"Ok, everyone calm the hell down." Hook says… but it's not really Hook but Emma. He… she turns to Snow's body. "And you shut up!"

"Is that anyway to talk to your mother?"

They had been practicing dueling, when Rumple accidentally misfired a curse that flew in Emma, Snow, David and Hook's directions. He had intended to hit Regina with a ball of fire, but hey! They were in Neverland, and in Neverland magic is different. Now Hook was in Snow's body, David was in Emma's, Emma was in Hook's and Snow was in David's.

"Can you do something?" Hook asks her step grandmother.

"I'm sorry Emma, but I think I like everyone better this way." Regina smirks at Hook, who scratches his itchy stubble. He… she turns to David… uhh Snow. "You just had to anger a witch."

"What are we supposed to do now?" Emma asks. "I mean I'm all for bonding with my daughter… but this is just too far…"

"Perhaps we can get to know our new bodies more…" Snow grins, turning to Hook. "Feel free to explore Swan."

"Hook can you not flirt with my daughter, while you're in my body?" David asks.

"Maybe I can take advantage now at the fact that I have two hands." Snow says peeking down her own shirt.

"That's it! I'm going to kill him!" Emma lunges at Snow. David stops her.

"Honey, as much as I want to… I'd prefer not to have bruises and cuts, when my body is returned to me."

"Gold! How long before you fix this?" Hook asks.

"Patience dearie. " Gold says. "Unfortunately we'll have to reach shore to collect the ingredients for the antidote."

"Arrrggg!" Hook screams.

"Careful Swan." Snow begins. "You almost sound like a pirate."

"How long until we reach land Hook?" Emma asks Snow.

"A good five hours, give or take."

"Kill me now." Hook groans at the sky.

"As much as I'd love to dispose of a one handed pirate," Gold sneers. "I'm afraid it'll have to wait until the antidote takes effect."

"Right, I'll go get my rum." Snow says, ready to head down to Hook's cabin.

"Whoa, no way!" David snaps. "You are not getting drunk. Especially in my body!"

"Aye." Snow raises her… his eyebrow. "I'd much rather be in Swan's body." Hook turns a dark shade of red. Emma looks ready to punch her… him… her… whatever!

"Now, I need a drink." Regina groans, trying to get THAT picture out of her mind. "You all do know that we're here to get my son, not to bed each other."

"Oh God! What if we encounter the Lost Boys like this!" Hook whines. "What if we find Henry like this! I don't want him to run from me, thinking I'm a suicidal pirate!"

"Hey!" Snow protests, a little offended.

"Don't worry Emma." Emma states. "It's going to be fine, right Gold."

"Yes your majesty. The antidote is easy to make, and has an immediate effect Miss Swan."

But Hook sinks to the ground and starts to cry, messing up his eyeliner. He brings up his hands to rub his eyes, but immediately hits himself in the face with his hook.

"Arghhh! Seriously!"

"Watch the face!" Snow exclaims.

"This is going to be a long day." Emma sighs.

"You got that right, mate." Snow replies.

"Not your mate Hook."

"Yeah, you're my daughter…"

**This is what I do when I'm not inspired for my other stories. If you have an idea for a prompt, review or pm me! So what did you think of this one? :)**


	3. I Hate You, But I Love You (pt 1)

**Okay so this might not be a one shot...**

**Summary: Killian and Emma grow up together.**

The night sky is glimmering in stars, as King Charming's royal ship passes through the seas. He and his wife: Queen Snow White, and daughter: Emma, are returning to their palace after a trip to Queen Abigail's Kingdom. They had just finished signing a truce between the two kingdoms through the betrothal of Princess Emma to Prince Steven. Emma of course is not pleased by the actions, but like a good little princess, she obeyed her parents' commands. Snow and Charming on the other hand are elated by the fact that their ten year old girl is betrothed to a notable prince of her age. They have no idea of their daughter's discontent.

Emma looks out to the sea, admiring the soft waves caressing the ship's wooden frame, when she sees small boat rowing away from a rather large wreckage, slowly sinking down to the depths of the ocean.

"Mother! Father! Look! There's someone in the water!" Emma calls out.

Quickly, Charming and Snow have the boat hauled upwards onto the ship. A man aboard the boat is bleeding profusely from his side, stuttering out words.

"Please, help my boy." He says, before falling unconscious. Beside him a twelve year old boy with dark black hair and a handsome young face. There is a large gash upon the boy's forehead, and he looks t be knocked out.

Charming checks the pulse on the older man and turns to his wife, shaking his head. The boy is quickly brought down to the cabins where a healer takes a look at him. Snow brings her daughter down to see how the boy is doing, surprised to find him awake. Emma has to fight a gasp as she realizes how blue his eyes are. Blue like the ocean. Soon, the royals discover that the boy's name is Killian Jones, and that he escaped from a pirate ship.

* * *

_A year later, Emma is eleven and Killian is thirteen._ He is now a boy living on the castle grounds, taken in by Geppetto. Geppetto's son, Pinocchio, and Killian become best friends and play with Emma constantly, or what they think is play.

"Killian! Give it back now!" Emma screams, chasing the dark haired boy across the gardens. Killian took her tiara and was using his superior height and fast legs to keep it away from the little princess.

"Or what princess? Are you going to get the King and Queen to come to your rescue? Or maybe that bloody prince of yours?" Killian mocks.

"You said 'Bloody'!" Pinocchio yells. "I'm telling father!" He and Killian were best friends, and would often help him on his plots to annoy Princess Emma.

"Argh! He's not my prince! I hate him! But you know what?"

"What princess?"

"I hate you even more!" She stomps off towards the castle in tears.

"Well, good!" Killian calls after her equally angered. Even though, deep down, he feels different.

* * *

_A few years pass by and Emma is now fifteen and Killian is seventeen_. Geppetto finds him a nice maiden to be betrothed to once he turns twenty. Emma prepares for her first ball as a lady, she is to turn eighteen today, dumping her beige trousers and white tunic for a golden dress. Johanna lets Emma's hair down, suspending a few curls in a crystal clip.

Outside from Emma's door, Killian prepares to deliver some harsh comment to the way Emma looks and tease her into tears, but as she enters the hallway, he finds himself speechless and staring in awe.

"What do you want?" Emma snaps, her hands on her hips. She can't help but stare back, because he's in a black shirt that's opened up half way, revealing his bare chest, which has developed a few muscles.

"I.. uhh…" He begins.

"You what?" She gulps.

"I.. uh.. came to say goodbye." He blurts out.

"Goodbye?"

"Your parents found where my mother is. I'm going to visit her for a while, see where I come from."

"Oh." Emma says, not knowing what else to say. "Are you going to stay for the party?" A cocky grin takes over his face.

"My, my, princess. Not ready for me to leave yet?" He mocks, giving her a smoldering look he never thought he would. Emma looks at him a little taken aback.

"No, I just want to know when I can finally celebrate." She shoots back.

"Ah, well I will be staying for your birthday. I'm afraid it would be a shame to miss the princess turning into a beautiful woman." _Whoa, beautiful? Where's this bloody coming from?_

"Well then Mr. Jones, care to lead me to the ballroom?" She asks with a smile. A twinkle of mischief sparkles in his eyes as he takes her hand.

They danced that night, and much to their surprise, they like it. Once upon a time, they were children who couldn't stand each other, but now they couldn't get enough of each other. Too bad fate had another thing in mind…

* * *

_He is twenty and she is almost nineteen when he returns_. He's completely different. The once annoying scrawny boy with messy hair, is now a fully grown man with a nice toned body and a face that makes all the maidens swoon.

It's the night before she is to be married to Prince Steven and all she wants to do is get away. She convinces Alexandra and Pinocchio to join her at a tavern so they can drink their troubles away. Her hair is loose and flowing along her crisp peach shirt. Her body is accented by the tight beige leather corset and matching beige pants. A dark brown cloak looms over her form, sweeping the floor as she walks into the tavern. The trio stay in the corner of the bar, when a burly man comes up to them.

"What are two pretty girls like you doing in a scary place like this?" The man mocks. Pinocchio immediately steps in front of the two girls, trying to ward the man off. But apparently the man isn't alone. _Great,_ Emma thinks, _Pirates!_

Two of the hooligans separate Pinocchio from the girls, while the others admire the women's forms, licking their lips. Alexandra immediately backs up against the wall, trembling. One of the five approaches Emma, yanking her by her hair, his fishy breath ghosting over her skin.

"I suggest you back away now, before you bloody regret it." Comes a smooth voice.

The burly man turns around to see a tall young man dressed head to toe in leather, with a dark scruff and messy black hair. His blue eyes swirling with rage, dangerous yet inviting, like the sea. He locks eyes with Emma, who's silently pleading with him

"Stand down Jones!" The burly man snaps. _Jones?_ Emma thinks. "You are in no position to make threats."

"I said…" Killian pulls out his sword and places it against the man's neck. "…back away." The four other pirates look to the burly one for orders, but he laughs and lets go of Emma. As the men retreat, he goes up to Killian and whispers something in his ear.

"You're father would be ashamed of you Jones." He and the others leave the tavern, leaving Killian, Emma, Pinocchio and Alexandra alone.

"Killian! You freaking scoundrel!" Pinocchio exclaims with a huge grin. He jumps at him with a bear hug and hooks his arm around Killian's neck, ruffling his hair. "When the hell did you get back man? And what the hell happened to you?"

"Well, I just docked from sea, and I had to find work somewhere."

"So you picked a pirate ship?" This time Emma speaks, her signature judgmental look crossing her features.

"Aye, turns out my father knew the Captain, and he owed my father." Killian replies. "I must say princess you look good." His voice gives her chills, causing her breath to hitch. He must have noticed this because he winks at her. Freaking winks! "And Alexandra! Look how you've grown."

"Well some of us had to mature." Alexandra cracks a smile at Pinocchio.

"Come on man." Pinocchio ignores his girlfriend. "We got to get you back to the castle. Give those old royals a second reason to celebrate!"

"What are we celebrating in the first place?"

"Oh nothing, just little Emma's getting married tomorrow!"

"Married?" Killian's voice cracks. He looks… hurt?

"Yeah." Emma replies, looking down. She doesn't want to get married, especially not to Prince Steven, who's turned into a greater brat than before.

"Well, then congratulations princess." He smiles weakly, offering his hand. She takes it and smiles back.

"Thanks."

They reach the castle within the hour. Killian receives a warm welcome from all. Even though, half the females in the room are practically throwing themselves at him, he can't take his eyes off of Emma, who is tense beside Steven. She can't help but return Killian's gazes.

After a rather long feast, everyone relaxes in the ballroom, chatting and getting to know each other. Gepetto is in tears at the man Killian has become, even after he backhands him for becoming a pirate, causing Pinocchio to laugh. Alexandra and Pinocchio exchange a few kisses, while Red and her fiancé, Victor Frankenstein, snuggle in the back. Even the King and Queen can't help but show their affection in public. These displays make both Emma and Killian practically sick to their stomach, especially considering Emma is trying to pry Steven's hands off her body, and Killian is trying to ditch Lady Scarlett, the maiden who he is betrothed to, as she follows him around like a love sick puppy.

These events continue until a large smack echoes through the ballroom. Everyone turns around to see Steven rubbing his red cheek, and Emma on the verge of tears. Embarrassed, Emma flees the ballroom. Snow is ready to chase after her, but Killian steps in.

"My lady, I will go and check on the princess. You enjoy the festivities."

"Thank you Killian." Snow replies.

"No. It is I who should be thanking you, for all the kindness you have given me." He bows to the Queen and heads off to find Emma.

He isn't surprised when he stumbles upon her sitting by the old willow tree at the pond. Emma grabs a stone next to her and launches it into the water, watching as it skips off to oblivion.

"Funny finding you here princess." He says, sitting beside her. She sighs.

"I thought I told you never to call me that?"

"Aye, but I thought you knew that I never listen." He snorts, and then becomes more serious. "What did he do?"

"I told him not to touch me. I told him to leave me alone." She starts, throwing another stone into the water. "He tried to kiss me. I don't love him, I don't want him." She finally turns to look at him, her eyes glimmering in the moonlight. "Why are you here?"

"I came to see if you were alright."

"Why?" She snaps.

"I don't like seeing you hurt. I'm worried about you."

"If you don't like seeing me hurt, you would have never left!" The words leave her mouth before she can stop them.

"I didn't think you'd give a damn." He mutters.

"I used to hate you. You made my life a living hell." She begins. "But then you had to leave, and you changed everything. I worried every day about you Killian. You could have wrote, you could have told me you were okay! I cried myself to sleep at night, hoping that you'd return, that you'd come back home. To me." Their faces are inches apart, eyes staring into the other.

"Emma…" Years ago, they wanted to tear their hair out when around each other, but now, all they want to do is tear each others clothes off.

**To be continued….**


	4. Babysitting

**Summary: Poor Henry has no one to look after him... Very Fluffy, this story came from too much sugar.**

"Are you sure you have to work today?" Snow asks her daughter and husband, who are putting on their coats at the door.

"Yeah, there have been a few break-ins around town. Not to mention everyone's starting to get a little pissed. We have to meet Regina there soon." Emma tells her mother. She then turns to little Henry who is digging into a plate of pancakes at the island counter. "Are you going to be okay kid?"

"Mhm." Henry says, his mouth filled with the sugary food.

"He'll be fine." Snow assures Emma, then turns to peck David on the cheek. "It's not the first time I've taken care of him."

"We shouldn't be long." David says. "I love you Mary Margaret."

"I love you." She counters, nuzzling her nose against his.

Father and daughter leave the apartment, and Snow takes a good look at her grandson.

"So, what do you want to do today Henry?"

"Can we go to Granny's?"

"But you just ate!" Mary Margaret exclaims. Henry shrugs.

"I have room for a hot cocoa." He grins. Snow sighs, as he looks at her with puppy dog eyes. He'd be the death of her, those eyes would get him through anything. But hey! He is her grandson, it's her job to spoil him.

"Let's go." She smiles.

When they get to the Diner, Snow White get's a call from Grumpy , to get down to the mines as soon as possible.

She sees Neal walk in and rushes towards him.

"Neal! Thank God!"

"Mary Margaret? What's up?" He exclaims, a little surprised at her frantic state.

"Could you look after Henry for a bit?"

"Yeah sure! No problem."

"Thank you!" She runs out the diner, and Henry happily trots over to his father.

"So buddy, what would you like to do?" The boy smiles in response.

After a bit of sword fighting on the beach, Neal gets an urgent call from his father.

"You WHAT?"

"Belle may have gotten mad at me… and thrown a vial of a not so safe potion at me." Gold says. "I need your blood to counter the effect… ow… hurry!"

Neal drops the wooden sword on the sandy beach and sees Ruby walking along the waters with Dr. Whale.

"Ruby! Whale! Can you watch Henry? I've got an emergency with my dad."

"Oh." Red looks to boy drawing shapes in the sand. "Sure no problem."

Ruby and Whale take Henry to the park, when the doctor's pager starts beeping.

"It's your granny." Whale tells Ruby. "She had a heart attack." Red's eyes widen. They can't bring Henry to the hospital, but they are also in a rush. She spots a man walking by the park.

"Hook!"

Emma is tired. All day, she, Regina, David and Snow were down at the mines, helping the dwarves contain Maleficent, who had finally found a way to breech her prison. In the yellow bud, she, David and Mary Margaret drive back to the apartment, ready to make dinner and recount the day's events to little Henry. When they walk down the hall to the front door, they hear loud metal clashing against metal. Emma and David cautiously whip out their guns and barge into the apartment, not ready for what they are witnessing.

The couch is flipped, the chairs are thrown across the room. A few paper towels lie on the floor, on fire. And on top of it all, Henry is sitting on the over turned couch, next to a soon to be dead pirate… with a bottle in his hands… rum.

"What the hell!" Emma yells.

"Ah, Swan!" Hook replies casually. "I was wondering when you would show."

"Oh my God! Henry, you're too young to drink that!" Snow exclaims, yanking the bottle of rum from the eleven year old's hands.

"You gave my SON RUM?" Emma exclaims.

"Well, in our world, twelve was the normal age at which a young lad would take his first sip." Hook shrugs.

"He's ELEVEN!" Charming yells.

"What the hell are you even doing with him? Mary Margaret, I thought you said Neal had him?" Emma snaps to her mother.

"He did!" Snow snaps back.

"Well, it was the wolf girl and the doctor who passed young Henry to me." Hook replies, trying to help, causing all three of the adults to glare daggers at him.

"And what the hell did you do to my apartment?!" Emma takes a menacing step forward.

"We were practicing sword fighting!" Henry exclaims, jumping off the couch with a grin. "It was awesome."

"I thought I was teaching you?" Charming mumbles.

"Yeah but he's a pirate." Then everyone notices something on Henry's face. Emma walks towards him and stares into his eyes, then looks down on the floor to see her expensive Clinique black eyeliner, carelessly lying upon the carpet.

"Are you wearing my eyeliner?" Emma exclaims.

"Yeah, Killian, showed me how to apply it." Everyone stares at the boy wide eyed.

"I believe I should be going then." Hook says sneaking out the door.

It takes a moment for the shock to wear away, then before Henry knows it, the three Charmings dash out the door to go pirate hunting.

**Review? Currently working on my main fics and trying to finish part 2 of "I Hate You, But I Love You", but open to more prompts**

**Coming Soon: Hart Archer... Hook discovers Singlebrooke;)**


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